噓 ericpony:要秀英文也先檢查一下好嗎 文法錯得太誇張了 軟體翻的吧 04/28 17:38
你好
我是先前立法院內翻譯團隊英文組的組長
剛剛看了一下先前熱心網友翻譯的英文版不自殺宣言
確實有不少文法和用字上的錯誤
仗著我曾經修過法律英文翻譯的課程
我剛剛閒著沒事也來翻譯一下
歡迎各位網友比較、批評與指教
也歡迎大家任意轉錄
I, xxx, do hereby solemnly declare the following:
I, of sound mind and body, do not suffer from any chronic illnesses of either
a physical or mental nature, and will therefore incontrovertibly refrain from
all suicidal actions or any events that may be thus construed.
I do not suffer from insomnia, and therefore do not and will not take sleep-
inducing medication of any kind.
I am not an alcoholic and am not a user of any illicit drugs or other
illegal substances.
I have never and will never venture in the vicinity of the following:
1. Open waters.
2. Swimming pools where a lifeguard is not present.
3. Places where high-pressured or hazardous gases are present, or basements
or water storage facilities lacking proper ventilation.
4. Any elevated location where no proper safety rails or safeguards are
present.
5. Any construction site (except those pertaining to the demolishing of the
government), including sites where breakwater blocks are made.
6. Any site or locale not covered in the above criteria, but is nevertheless
not where normal persons of sound mind and body will enter.
I have and will always adhere strictly to the following:
1. I will thoroughly inspect my vehicle for any faults or malfunctions before
driving, and will turn off the power on my vehicle and on my cell phone
before refueling.
2. I will never run a red light, nor accelerate past a yellow light.
3. When taking any form of rail transport, before the train has come to a
complete stop, I will always retreat to a distance of at least one step
behind the waiting line.
4. When riding a motorcycle, I will always wear a certified helmet; when
driving or riding in a car, I will always wear a seat belt.
5. I will never venture near any locale or equipment where radiation poses an
immediate risk to the human body (for example, nuclear power plants).
6. I will never head into the mountains or to the seashore during typhoons or
otherwise stormy weather.
I have and will always do my utmost to adhere to safety standards when using
appliances and equipment powered by electricity, natural gas, or fire.
The electrical wiring in my residence is in compliance with relevant
regulations, and has not nor will ever be the cause of a fire.
I have and will never store excessive amounts of flammable gases or liquids
in my residence.
My bathrooms are free of all electric appliances, except necessary lighting.
Before sleeping, I always turn off all electric appliances, except any
necessary lighting, the refrigerator, and electric fans.
I have and will never engage in disputes or clashes, physical or otherwise,
with persons with whom I am not acquainted. Moreover, I have and will always
strive to ensure my personal safety.
If, after being notified of the above, my fellow netizens discover that this
ID has disappeared from online activity for a substantial amount of time,
please do all in your means to seek justice for me. Thank you.
---------------------------------
中文版 縮: http://goo.gl/A4WAjX
http://tunergray.blogspot.com/2014/04/blog-post_25.html
爆掛用的不自殺聲明
挺悲哀的，曾幾何時，這類聲明在爆某些掛的時候出現...，或是必須要出現
...。
本人__________在此特地聲明：
本人樂觀開朗，身體健康，無任何使我困擾之慢性病或心理疾病，故絕不可能做
出任何看似自殺之行為。
本人從無睡眠困擾，故不需服用安眠藥。
本人不酗酒亦不吸毒，也絕不會接近下列地點：
1. 開放性水域
2. 無救生員之游泳池
3. 有高壓、危險氣體，或密閉式未經抽氣處理之地下室、蓄水池、水桶等
4. 無安全護欄之任何高處
5. 任何施工地點（拆政府除外），包括製作消波塊之工地
6. 任何以上未提及但為一般人正常不會前往之地點
本人恪遵下列事項：
1. 車輛上路前會檢查煞車部件、油門線等，並會在加油前關閉車輛電源與行動電
話。
2. 絕不擅搶黃燈、闖紅燈。
3. 乘坐任何軌道類交通工具一定退到警戒線後一步以上，直到車輛停妥。
4. 騎乘機車必戴安全帽；乘車必繫安全帶。
5. 絕不接近任何會放射對人體有立即危害的輻射之場所（如核電廠）或設備。
6. 颱風天不登山、不觀浪。
本人將盡可能注意電器、瓦斯、火源之使用。
本人居住之房屋均使用符合法規之電路電線，絕無電線走火之可能；
也絕未在家中放置過量可燃性氣體或液體。
浴室中除該有之照明外，不放置任何電器用品，並在睡覺前關閉除電燈、冰箱、
電扇外之所有電器開關。
本人絕不會與隨機的不明人士起衝突，並盡可能保護自我人身安全。
所以若網友在看完此聲明之後，近期或將來發現此帳號不再上線，請幫我討回公
道，謝謝。
--
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推 rhink:專業的來了！！ 04/28 20:55
推 vincent0728:高手來啦！！ 04/28 20:55
推 princessru:太強了!!! 04/28 20:56
推 FIRZEN45:實用推 04/28 20:56
推 arsjapan:推~~~ 04/28 20:59
推 DRIariel: 04/28 21:12
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
※ 轉錄者: DRIariel (124.8.231.197), 04/28/2014 21:13:22
推 wl1451226:立院翻譯組!! 04/28 21:21
推 liga504123:專業推 04/28 21:27
推 MADAOTW:好強 差點懷疑這是英文嗎 04/28 21:55
推 sholock:專業推 04/28 22:18
推 piatigorsky:@MADAOTW: ?? 04/28 22:23
補中文版。
補圖版 之連結。
其他英文學習相關資料
影片
老外精選：超譯沒有極限 爆笑中翻英特輯
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OhgQsnmf0us